I have known so many people throughout my life who let their pride and ego get in the way of forgiveness. I have been one of those people at times. I’m sure you have as well. I know it is hard to forgive sometimes. It feels like it is a “give” on our part or like we are excusing the wrong behavior…but we also rationally know that hanging on to a wrong only hurts us. We are so stubborn at times. What makes us think that not forgiving someone is healthy or will do any good? Why would we think that holding on to that negative energy will hurt the other person? The energy of un-forgiveness is so very heavy. When we look at it in that light, it seems so very silly, doesn’t it? We are intentionally hurting ourselves…that is so counterproductive!
I know that when we are in the emotional bubble of being hurt, our pride makes us feel like the other person needs to apologize and that they must pay for what they have done…or that maybe they do not deserve to be forgiven or to have our friendship. But true forgiveness tells us otherwise. Forgiving is for you, not for the perpetrator. I have learned that the other person does not even need to know that you have forgiven him or her…because it is not for them, it is for you!
Most people have a goal to feel true peace, joy, and love. These emotions are at the top of the emotional scale. When we live in this place, we are vibrating at a very high frequency. Forgiveness is right up there with these other beautiful emotions. When we live feeling and demonstrating these emotions, we get more situations and people in our lives that allow us to experience more of this bliss. Contrarily, when we hold judgment, hatred, anger, revenge, and pride because of not forgiving someone, then we are vibrating at a very low frequency. This allows more bitterness and ugly negative situations and people to enter our lives.
A very condensed Emotional Scale, but you get the picture.
When we look at it this way, it is so empowering…we have a choice! We get to decide to forgive and move right on up that emotional scale. When we know we have a choice and we choose to stay in those negative emotions, we are letting our pride and ego take charge. That is a heavy load to carry…especially when the other person has probably forgiven you and has moved on their merry way up the emotional scale to freedom, joy, and love.
Some people scoff this, but take a look around…you are living proof. If you are one to hold a grudge, take a look at what you are attracting. Do you run into nasty people all the time? Do you have roadblocks in your social and work environments? Do you have constant inner turmoil? Do you continuously feel like you are rowing upstream and you can’t get ahead? If you are a person living in joy and love, do you run into pleasant people all the time? Do you seem to waltz through life effortlessly? Do things fall into your lap? It is real and it works. Tell your pride and ego to move over and start living at the top of the emotional scale!
Take Action: This week and moving forward, let’s take an emotional inventory. If we are holding on to a grudge and not forgiving someone, let’s make it right in our mind and heart so we can be free from the negative emotions that are holding us hostage. If you are floating along with love and joy in your heart, keep up the good work and help someone you know break free from those chains that bind them.
Because Together is Better,