Love Letter to Self

love letter

How many love letters do you think you have written to other people in your lifetime? I'm not just talking about love letters to a perspective or current flame…but also to your mom, dad, friends, siblings, children, bosses, teachers, coaches, grandparents, etc. A love letter is a letter in which you are writing an expression of your gratitude and affection towards another person. So, with all the birthdays, graduations, weddings, anniversaries, etc…how many love letters do you think you have written to people who are important in your life? I would bet that it is in the hundreds. I bet it is more than you can remember or dream of. "Writing" a letter, can also include putting loving and grateful words on greeting cards, sticky notes, text messages, and emails. The list is growing, isn't … [Read more...]

The Benefits of Complaining

complaining

For those of you who know me or have been reading this blog long enough will recognize that the title of this post, "The Benefits of Complaining" is simply used to peak your curiosity. There simply are no benefits to complaining! Yes, you may need to vent or burn off a little steam now and again…we all do…but idle and perpetual complaining has no positive outcome. We've all had them, people in our lives, who complain and complain and complain. Instead of focusing on all the wonderful parts of their lives, they choose to give all their energy to the dark side. Why do people complain? It is ugly, it is draining, it is unproductive, it is self-consuming, and it is a repellent. I have learned, and I'm sure you have learned this as well: Complaining doesn't solve anything. If a person … [Read more...]

Move Out Of Your Own Way

Move

The other day, three of my daughters and I were cleaning like Mad-Women. We were organizing the play room closet…and I mean organizing! We were cleaning out toy bins, finding missing game pieces, replacing, shifting, and throwing away. It was a mad overhaul. We spent hours working together. When we finished the playroom closet, we moved on to my youngest daughter's closet…we did the same thing there. When we were finished, we took four kitchen trash bags full to the "Black Can". We also buried an eighteen year old Lego table and a non-working baby doll stroller. Overall, it was a cleaning success. During this process, there was a "situation" that resulted in tears, yelling, and sadness: My 8 year old and I had a huge communication gap. I stepped on her toes and caused some hard … [Read more...]

Compassion In the Face of Tragedy

Compassion

I have always known that people are mostly good-hearted. I have seen countless events, which were tragedies or brought heartache, where people pulled together and somehow become one. Differences seem to magically fade to the background, and a mutual respect for life comes to the surface. These situations seem to bare our souls, it strips us of any vanity, and people become real. Their defenses disappear and their motives become clearly humane. It seems that of late, there are more personal tragedies surrounding us. But, in fact, there have always been tragedies in this world…they just appear more numerous and ever-present when they hit close to our hearts. With the media, email, Face Book, and all the immediate ways to communicate, we are alerted instantly and continuously. Think back … [Read more...]

I Am…

I am

"I am…" is an amazingly small but powerful statement. If you become aware of your spoken words and unspoken thoughts, you will find that you and these two words are very intimate. This small statement is so powerful because it is a declaration. When you say, "I am…" you are declaring it so! You are making a proclamation to the world, to the Universe, to your higher power, to others and to yourself! Unfortunately, most of the "I am's" are derogatory. Do you believe me? How about you pay attention to your thoughts and words for an hour and see if I am right. I bet you will say or think at least one thing negative to or about yourself in that time. Here are just a few examples: I am so fat. I am stupid. I am never on time. I am confused. I am not good enough. I am so mean sometimes. I am … [Read more...]

Tough Love

Tough Love

I remember watching movies and television shows when I was a child, and whenever the parent had to spank or discipline their child they would say, "This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you." As a child, I never understood this… I thought, yeah right, the spanking I'm getting will hurt you!?!" Now, as an adult, having my own children, I do understand. It is so hard and truly painful to discipline your child. We don't want our children to go through pain and suffering. We don't want to be the cause of their hurt and discomfort…we want to take their aches away. We want them to have a carefree life. But, nobody said that being a parent was going to be easy or pain free. Actually, it is the hardest job I have ever had! It's hard to do the right thing and to be the "Bad Guy"…but … [Read more...]

When Should You Apologize?

Sorry

The other day I was listening to one of my sisters tell me a story: She and her 4-year-old daughter had just arrived home from a fun day at Disneyland. My sister was unloading her car as her daughter happily trotted inside. All of a sudden my sister heard a terrible screaming noise and immediately her "Mama-Bear" instincts kicked in! With adrenaline racing through her veins, she ran to check on her daughter. Thankfully, the screams were not her daughter. She ran outside again, toward the screams…trying to find the victim and offer help. What she found was a neighbor's dog violently attacking another neighbor's smaller dog. The screaming sound was coming from the smaller dog! The owner of the smaller dog came running out of her house crying and frantically trying to save her … [Read more...]

Under Pressure?

pressure

This week I have been surrounded by people who have been under a great deal of social pressure. So naturally, as an intuitive writer, my mind has gone into full swing as to why this has been ever present for me. I know this is a topic that everyone can relate to, as we all are under different degrees of pressure daily. I am not talking about pressure with work or money or health, or the good pressure that pushes you to do better or meet a deadline…just social pressure. How do you handle everyday social pressure? How do you deal with people who want something from you that you don't want to give? Here are a few examples of pressures that I have witnessed and experienced this week. Maybe you can relate: My teenager is feeling a lot of "peer pressure". There is so much pressure in … [Read more...]

Gossip is Ugly

Gossip

I have known many people (sadly, mostly women) who spend a lot of time gossiping. I, too, have been guilty of this evil act, and it never brings goodness to you. Even if there is no direct backlash, you are left with an icky feeling that you have not been true to someone. I think when others talk about people, in a bad way; it is quite possibly the ugliest thing I have ever seen. It makes an otherwise beautiful person look unattractive. It produces so much havoc. Why do people gossip? I think they do it to make them look and feel better about who they are. Why else would you talk poorly about someone else? There is absolutely no benefit to you….unless you are trying to make someone look bad so that you will look better. Webster defines gossip this way: Gossip (noun) – a) … [Read more...]

Impact and Influence Others

Be

Funny how it is…well, it's actually quite sad…we usually are more concerned about how other's words and actions will affect us rather than being concerned about how our words and actions will affect others. We've all been there, we've all done it. In class, at work, at a party, we think to ourselves or voice to a friend, "OH NO, there's so-in-so! Whether they speak too loudly, drink too much, are negative, are obnoxious, rub us the wrong way, etc…we would rather not interact with them. They make us feel uncomfortable, we have to make small talk, and we can't wait to be released from their presence. We don't like the way their words and actions affect us. We even do it with strangers…if someone looks different or "weird" we don't want to … [Read more...]